University of Hartford Causes

Controversy at Charles River Race

UPI: The University of Hartford has caused quite a stir at this years Race of the Charles event set to get under way this April. At the heart of the controversy is the University's desire to use their mascot Howie the Hawk as one of their team members. "Nothing in the rules say that we can't use a bird as one of our paddlers", cried David de Manbey, the team organizer. "The event is for charity, and the officials of the Charles River Race should do the right thing and just let well enough alone." Other teams don't see it quite that way. "They have an unfair advantage using Howie", quipped Roger Wells of team Wampanoag Paddling Club. "Have you seen the pecs on Howie, its down right scary. They don't allow steroids, and our team has been practicing hard - it just ain't fair. We intend to fight this all the way." "It's just awful what all this has done to Howie", remarked Ellen Crandall, one of the paddlers for the University. "We always saw him at sports events at the University cheering the teams on, but now he just seems so forlorn amidst all this controversy. Even worse, everyone makes fun of the fact he can't speak."

Although Howie has never been heard speaking, he does excel at many activities. Howie has consistently made the deans list at the University.

Where does this leave the Charles River Race and the University of Hartford? Certainly this is a contoversy that is not about to end soon. A few feathers are apt to fly at this years race, the university of Hartford hopes it not their mascots.